Unknowns

Pardon me while I get mushy and off my usual snarky bent. My aunt R is in one hell of a situation of situations. I must keep the confidence of information, but I know that I couldn't deal with half of what is on her plate...if not even one percent of what she is handling. What I can, and will tell you about is her impending surgery this Tuesday the 26th. She has a mass on her thyroid, and it's started to "vascularize". This means it's started attaching itself to her vascular system (aka bloodstream) and that is a big red flag for something being cancerous. Fear? You bet. She and I both carry it. She's got the additional stress that has her stomach upset as well. I would be unable to get out of bed. She's a very strong woman and I've always had high regard for her, even when I was a mere preschooler and she came to visit all the way from Missouri. The next time I saw her was when I was 15 and we spent 6 weeks of our Summer vacation up there and that vacation was probably my absolute favorite of all. She and I were virtually inseperable. OK, so it was more like I was up her backside and if she stopped short, my size 10s would be dangling from behind her. I always knew we were quite a lot alike, and she sees herself of years past in me now. We think alike quite a bit, we get the same jokes (usually no one else does), we relate in so many ways. She has incredible friends that paid for her to come down here for my mom's funeral 3 years ago. I could hug RH if I met her, and thank her for giving me a great gift such as that. I came to know things about my mother that were hidden from me. My mom handled her wounds in different ways, and I was able to make peace with her death by those stories R shared with me. It's entirely possible that I helped R make peace with her half-sister's death (although it's all or nothing in our family) or at least helped get some sense of closure on it..I don't know. We have come to rely on each other and I just wish I could be geographically closer to her, even temporarily because she needs the help. As it happened, less than a year after my mom died, my uncle D died of uncertain circumstances. My grandmere who is 2 weeks older than my Dad, is getting frail and needs help from R. There is much more that I can't disclose that just blows my mind. I fear for R's health and well being and yet I can only sit, hundreds of miles away, praying that she is returned to health so I can still have my Aunt R in my life. Between her, Persnickety and my friend C, I have a plethora of medical knowledge and trivia factiods to entertain myself for years. I have been incredibly blessed to have the friends and family I was granted. It just sucks when there's too much pepper in the pot and things get out of whack.

It's a pretty craptacular day when the highlight of her day consists of me telling her that it's my niece's birthday, an online chat buddy's birthday, and my friend H's birthing day-and that I was her labor coach via phone. (Yes, she was in a hospital and her husband was there. They're also in Michigan with no family or friends.)

So, please add my Aunt R and those around her to your prayers. Guidance, peace, clarity, fortitude and discernment. 2 Corinthians 12:9