Saturday, October 3, 2015

Go Pink AND Blue for October

October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day, and has been seen abbreviated as PAIL in some places.
There is a link going around crackbook with the headline saying something about how it is important that Mark Zuckerberg is being open and honest about the miscarriages he and his wife had. I shared the link with this blurb of commentary. I share it here, because at any point I may accidentally make a public post not so public, and the sentiments need to be shared where possible. The awareness ribbon for this is half pink, half blue. There's a hashtag going around social media, #goPINKandBLUE related to the awareness campaign.

"Talking about miscarriage should not be taboo, nor should it bring criticism and shame. No one should suffer alone or in silence in the wake of a pregnancy loss. I didn't, and that was only because I have amazing people in my life. They're amazing because I gave them the opportunity to demonstrate as much having reached out and shared with them. If you know someone who had a prior loss, or is going through a loss, do not be silent. Even if you only say "ugh, that sucks", that is better than no words, or worse, the crappy attempt at platitudes. When we're in the throes of grief, we do not want to hear "God has other plans" "you're young, you can try again", "it wasn't really a baby", "get over it already", or any number of things that are well meaning but actually hurt more. God may have other plans, but it still sucks monkey butt. Some people try and try and try and babies don't come easily to them. It was definitely a baby to that parent, because it sure as hell wasn't a puppy. There is never any getting over it. My 89 year old father still mourns the miscarriage losses of 50 & 30 years ago. And he wasn't even the one who was physically pregnant.
If my annoying people by talking about my miscarriage helps even one person to feel less alone in their grief, then you'll just have to suck it up and be annoyed about it. I don't keep talking about it to get sympathy. I talk about it because it not only helps me heal, but it helps someone else to just know they are not alone in their sorrow."

Forever My SweetPea is offering a free awareness ribbon graphic through October 14, 2015. This project is an amazing work of kindness, and I know it is taking a chunk of extra time and effort for them to do this for those of us with angels. If you have a moment, thank them for their generosity.

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